If we were sitting together this morning, chatting, I would ask you, "How did it go? Your Christmas?" You might say, "Well, I made it. Some days were harder than others. Our family worked to make it come together, but there were times when I had to cry. I would let myself have a good cry and then I would be okay for the next day or so. Then the pain would well up and back to my crying closet I would go."
I would listen and nod, but would let you do the talking. At your pace...at your will. I would say the name of your loved one and ask how you remembered him or her. You might say you lit a candle for them at every meal, or you sang their favorite Christmas songs, or cooked their favorite meal. Maybe you got out the photo albums and laughed over the really bad pictures together. Maybe you released a balloon on Christmas Day in memory and thanksgiving.
Wherever you are in the grief process - weeks, months, or years - these are all steps in the healing process. It is hard and it takes time, but little by little you find your way. The way is different and not the way you had planned, but it is your way now. You must find the road that will allow you to travel this unplanned journey.
And it is in hope we find our way. Romans 15:13 says: "May
the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that
you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit."
We have a God who is our hope. He fills us with hope as we trust in Him.
Sometimes it is in the very darkest hour we experience that hope. Author Anne Lamott says, "Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come." I really think what she means is: when you get to the bottom and there is nothing else, there is God holding out hope for us. There is God - the right thing - calling us to Him, asking us to trust Him.
Today, in your grief, the most courageous thing you might do is to take God's hand, and "as you trust in him" you will begin to experience that hope. Scripture says we will "overflow" but let's take one day at a time. Together. In time, we will overflow.
