Sometimes we just need to get away with our grief. No explanations are needed.
The pace of life runs us down and we search for respite and quiet and comfort. Even if it is impossible to physically get away like I did a few days ago - checked myself into a monastery to listen, sing, ponder, and pray - one can find time during the course of a day to listen, sing, ponder, and pray.
This is important for someone moving along in their grief journey.
Not only is it important, but it is a necessary step to healing and wholeness.
I have been studying and memorizing Psalm 121. It goes something like this:
I will lift my eyes to the hills. Where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord; the maker of Heaven and earth.
He will not let your foot slip; He who watches over you will will not slumber.
Indeed, he who watches of Israel neither slumbers or sleeps.
I will stop with those four verses for today because they say so much to us. I admit my need for help and I am looking all around for it. It is when I lift my eyes to the heavens, I begin to understand that all of my help comes from the Lord, the one who made all of heaven and earth. While I look for help, I can be assured that He is always watching me, because he never sleeps. He doesn't even nap! I know the maker of heaven and earth will keep my feet secure - I cannot slip.
But I know your question. You ask, "Well, God let my loved one die. Where was God when he was slipping through to the other side?" He was watching over the loved one as he died. He was wide awake, welcoming him into that place prepared for those who believe in Him.
Today is the first day of Lent, that season in the Christian year when we give up to grow in God's grace. We walk with Jesus to the cross. Anyone who grieves a loss can use this time of quiet contemplation to actually grow and become stronger, finding healing through Jesus.
He will walk by our side, never slumbering. He will show us the way.