How To Plan A Funeral

 Three days after the death of my daughter, we met at church for a memorial service for the one we loved. Many people came, friends and loved ones spoke and sang at the service. The choir sang and we tried to sing. Afterward, we gathered for a reception and greeted those who wished to stand in a long line. There was a beautiful display of food and flowers and pictures. It was a hard day, but a special day. A day of remembrance and worship and love.

Three days is not a very long time in which to put together a service for someone you love. You might have gotten sudden news and had to plan a service in total shock. You might not even remember it. That is normal but not at all fair. Death is never fair. I had to wait for the funeral to come to me. You see, I knew my daughter was dying. In fact, I planned her service at Christmas. Then it lingered toward Easter. And as summer blended into fall, it really happened.

I was still in shock. Death brings shock whenever it comes. We are never fully prepared. And we cannot think clearly. To this day, I cannot remember calling my family and best friends. But I can vividly remember stacks of paper plates and plastic cups appearing in my kitchen.I remember the bird feeder always being full. I remember everyone talking softly when all I wanted to do was scream.

My church was instrumental in leading us through those days. The church is a place where the needs of the heart are met. When my family could barely breathe, the church stepped in to plan, finalize, prepare, and serve us with love and compassion.

My friend in Colorado found herself planning a funeral unexpectedly. Afterward, she published a little book that everyone should have on the shelf, ready for that unexpected moment.

How to Plan a Funeral &Other Things You Need to Know When a Loved One Dies by Liz Cowen Furman

Beacon Hill Press
Buy the Book