The Best Father's Day Gift - Presence

I just wrapped a gift for my son for Father's Day. Just a small gift, but wrapped with a heart bursting with love and gratitude for the way he demonstrates love for his two children and strives to be a dad in real time. He's "hands on" sharing the responsibilities of all that parenthood entails - day-care pick-up and drop-off, mealtime, bath time, bedtime, doctor appointments, and a million other responsibilities. All the time, probably wondering if he is doing it well.

If he were to ask, I would tell him he was doing it well because he is doing it. He is actively present in the lives of his children. I pray as they grow up, that presence will be a constant in their lives.

 I was curious about the statistics and while I know there is an absence of fathers in the home today, I did not realize it was so prevalent. According to an article from this source  "More than 20 million children live in a home without the physical presence of a father.  Millions more have dads who are physically present, but emotionally absent.  If it were classified as a disease, fatherlessness would be an epidemic worthy of attention as a national emergency. "

I experienced a father's love. In the 50s that love might not have been so hands on. I don't ever remember my  military career dad reading me a book, tucking me in at night,  or making me pancakes. But I knew the steady, strong presence of a father who worked hard every day, came home every night, respected and loved my mother and daily supported our household. It probably wasn't until I was an adult that my dad (who was orphaned at 14) was comfortable with simply enjoying my company. And as the years went by, we became great friends. I knew that my father loved me, valued my husband, and adored my children. 

It is when I think about these statistics - more than 20 million children living without even the physical presence of a father, not to mention the emotionally absent ones - my heart breaks. What have we allowed to happen? How have we turned our heads to the greater societal problems and supported programs that while intended for good, created this devastation of the family unit?

 It's not that we haven't tried. A recent editorial in the WSJ said that since 1980 our country has spent over $22 trillion dollars trying to fix many of the problems in our society. You can be the judge as to whether we have succeeded. 

This Father's Day, spend some time thinking about the millions of children who have no presence of a father in their daily life. Look around to find a way to help a single mom. And if you are one of the fortunate ones who has a father in your home, thank him. Thank him and encourage him to stay the course.

Train up a child as to how he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it.